A manga where you can see treasured production materials & know the know-how of production 'Gas shop !!' Episode 1 making commentary
A full-color comic about the struggle and growth of Kayo Kiyu, who joined Hoshimi Life Equipment as a new graduate and is in her first year as a working adult
You can read the first episode by clicking the image below.
Read Episode 1, 'I'm Kayo Kiyu, a newcomer to the gas store!'
'Gas shop!' Is a series from the winning work of the GIGAZINE Manga Award. We are always looking for original scripts, drawings, and of course manga works, so if you are interested, please refer to the link below for details.
GIGAZINE Manga Award
https://manga.gigazine.net/
The first episode of 'Gasya de~su!!' is based on a monochrome manuscript that was submitted for the Manga Taisho. First of all, it is the first page that has been pointed out for correction. In the initial manuscript, the color door on the left side of the image below is the first page, and the right side of the image below is the first page of the main part. ``The first page of the first episode'' is the page that all readers go through, and it is the page that is read the most repeatedly, so it is necessary to put a lot of effort into making it. The following page is an introduction that arouses expectations, but it was not interesting enough as the most read page, so we made a correction by inserting the first page of the introduction.
The first page of the first episode was created with the aim of conveying the concept of the story 'Newcomer to the Gas Shop, Kayo Kiyu'. Also, as a character that mainly appears, there was also an intention to first put out 'Mr. Arika (upper right of the image below)' who did not show her face in the initial manuscript. On the other hand, it is important to convey the charm of the story from the first page, but if you cram too much information from the first page, it will be difficult to start reading. .
Another point related to the first page, about the composition of inserting a 'door picture' at the beginning. In the illustration on the left of the first image below, Kyu's feet are cut off at the edge of the screen. When drawing a single picture, there is an idea that it is easier to feel the character is more attractive if the whole body is included, or that if only a part of the body is cut off at the edge of the screen, the composition will look broken. Therefore, a door painting plan like the one on the right in the image below was created. In the end, it was decided to proceed with the story without inserting the frontispiece, but this new frontispiece plan will be used as an announcement illustration that will be released at a later date.
Register for GSC and read more about the limited making!
The next big revision was about the flow of the contract explanation at the customer's house. The image below is an explanation scene of the initial manuscript. is making customers angry.
In the explanation that follows, I explain carefully and politely that 'Why is it a rip-off?' There are three major problems that need to be fixed here. First of all, although I can tell that Iga is a capable boss, I feel that the development of teasing customers is a little bad. Next, it was pointed out that the series of explanations 'pera pera pera' 'doesn't seem to treat an incomprehensible amateur?' And finally, even though Kiyu is a newcomer who would be difficult without the support of seniors, he is the main character of the story, so ``It is unsatisfactory as a story if it is completed with only Iga-senpai's interaction and Kiyu is not involved.'' It's a point.
In order to avoid the impression that Iga-senpai is treating the customer while demonstrating his competence, the exchange has been changed so that the customer asks questions and Iga-senpai responds accurately. Since 'Gasya de~su!!' is intended to 'want people to know more about gas', it is easier for readers to understand by using a Q&A format rather than a one-sided question. In addition, by making it a flow of “Iga-senpai takes over the explanation role from Kyu who hastily stuffed sweets in her throat”, it is not just arranging explanations in the explanation scene, but even a little by incorporating Kyu’s reaction. The author's ingenuity is added to make it an interesting picture.
The following images are the same 'description scene' bot manuscripts. The Q&A is expressed with the image of 'an attacking bullfight and a dodging matador', and is devised to make the explanation scenes that tend to be boring interesting. It was an interesting idea, but it was rejected because it gave the impression that the customer was fluttering around, or that the customer was a troublesome rampaging cow.
One more point, the development was changed under the idea that 'Kiyu should be involved in this contract'. Originally, the contract was completed when Iga-senpai's explanation was over, but as in the scene below, Kyu interrupted the conversation and added an additional explanation.
Kiyu is still a newcomer who is still studying, so she can't respond to questions as accurately as Iga-senpai. Still, I'm sure I'm wearing what I've learned little by little. While presenting aspects that lead to such a coming-of-age story, Kyu, who is a cheerful child, has a slightly off-kilter appeal as a punchline, and the author's revised proposal to have customers like it was a perfect match, so it was adopted as it was. increase.
In addition, I was considering changing the development until the end repeatedly. In the early manuscript, after completing the contract at the customer's house, I went out to lunch and Iga-senpai said, 'Actually, my wife asked me to put a cutlet in my husband.' .
The original punchline was a good development as a one-episode conclusion, but in order to make the story continue in the serialized version, it was decided to introduce the 'company friends' who will be dating in the future. Due to the skill of the author, the personalities and relationships of each character are well presented in two pages.
Therefore, in the punchline of the second draft, a scene was added in which Kyu proposes to give a potted plant to the wife who likes flowers to commemorate the completion of the construction. It was a very good scene where we could see the side of Kyu who was close to customers and liked by people while collecting Kyu's remark, 'I can put a flowerpot!' It has become a bottu with it. If it ends too neatly, there is a risk that you will stop reading the serialized manga saying 'I'm done'. Therefore, it was necessary to pave the way as a 'continuing story'.
The revised manuscript that was created as a 'punch line that worries me about the continuation' is 'After the completion of the witnessing of the gas installation work after the contract, the next job request comes in on the way home.' On the left of the image below, Kyu, who is in high spirits due to the success of the contract, is overlaid with a narration that says, 'If you're on top of things, you'll be caught off guard... me!' Plan B on the right side of the image depicts “Kyu’s big failure” in episode 2, so while the monologue is optimistic, the crying face of Kyu depicted in episode 2 is included as a picture.
In the end, I combined the crying face scene of Kiyu, which had a strong impact with a gap from the bright development up to that point, with a depiction that predicted the shocking development of the next episode, and made it a punch line. Also, the message 'Continue to the Next job!! As a result of wondering between the gas cylinder and the logo of the work, the icon that matches the message was decided on the title logo on the right side of the image below.
In the future, in addition to pre-releases limited to GSC, we will also release treasured materials that show behind-the-scenes information and know-how, so please continue to support 'Gasya de~su!' If you have any other opinions or requests such as 'I want to see this kind of making with GSC
Related Posts:
